As I make a slow shift from recovering from serious medical issues back to the world, I’m itching to be sayin' that I know just what I’m going to do. It seems to be obvious to many other people what I should do, what I have a talent for and what my gifts are, but honestly there is not as much consistency in the views of others as you might expect.
For instance, just when I said I’m finished with screenwriting, of course, I get the first clear screenplay idea I’ve had in three years. Also, I had yet to fulfill one last promise to teach a screenwriting class to a film club of teenagers. Well, last night I taught the class and I remembered how much I love teaching this material. Seeing the lights switch on in their eyes as they began to comprehend the opportunities they have, should they choose this pursuit, was a true joy. I also gave them the wake-up call to how they’ll have to hone their skills and habits for quite a while to make it in a very competitive industry. They didn’t want to leave, and they told me that I was their favorite speaker so far. The icing on the cake was that my daughter is part of the club and I didn’t embarrass her at all. For a mom not to embarrass her teenager is better than anything I imagine. She said I was cool! I could definitely do it again.
Meanwhile, I finally drew, for a commissioned portrait project, a sketch that I feel will lead me to a great portrait of a life-long friend. This is huge. I feel like I finally rounded a big ass bend in the path towards making art a career. I’m getting down with how a whole project has to be planned, contracted, and fulfilled. It is a shy sort of love affair...we’re taking it slowly...but I think there is really great potential.
C.G. Jung Laughs, Oil Pastel on Black Archival Paper 2012 (c) Amanda Morris Johnson |
Still, where am I headed? What is my goal? To be honest, I also have my MRI appointment this week, and a meet up with my neurosurgeon next week. What I want more than anything is to be clear and mending ever more rapidly. I have a glimpse of regular life with regular commitments coming into the lens of my inner camera. I can’t drive yet, but I can imagine that I might be able to work out something to get out a little more. I can imagine socializing in real life a little bit more especially in order to share what I’ve learned and be helpful to others wanting to face their challenges with a snarky grin.
I want to finish this recovery period up and get out into the world and see what I can do. Can that be a goal? Is it that simple?
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